Haven't written in a while. Not sure I have the words. I have my days where things seem better but never a day goes by where I am not thinking about my angels. This is a hard month for me. A couple of my angels would have been due at the end of this month. As I look around it seems like everyone around me is having babies. I am so happy for them but there is also a sadness I feel for myself. A sadness knowing I won't hold another baby that I can call mine. I am not sure I am still ok with that decision (crazy isn't it). My husband is so certain that this is what he wants. I understand his point. We are blessed with our son and it would be too dangerous to try again.